When our children were young I always thought parenting would be easier when they get older. The late nights of fever and croup would be gone and I could have a full night of sleep. The house would finally be clean and STAY clean. No more worries! All those years of praying and teaching our children about God & His ways would pay off and they would be perfect!
Perfect! Perfect obedient teenagers/young adults. Perfect pastor’s kids. Halos over their perfect heads. Not an ounce of bad in them. They would never stray or do anything like the other teens would do. You know, that sin stuff. They would be content with staying with us and never experiencing life. The ups and downs of decisions made and realized. Our kids, perfect. Making all the right moves, never to slip or fall. After all the world is watching them. Watching just to see, watching to point and laugh, watching to accuse.
Yes, I lived in my own fairy tale. Haha, My reality is….. Our kids are not perfect but they are good. They are not without sin but at least they know when they do. There are no halo or angel wings around them. They know that when they make a dumb decision, it’s theirs. They own it. There is a consequence to everything we do or say, life is teaching them that lesson. Sometimes it’s a breeze but other times I ache for them. My heart breaks when theirs breaks and I long for the younger years once again.
Though I do have restful, content nights of sleep, I think I may have more restless, sleepless nights now. No, I’m not up with a fever or sore throats, I’m awake praying and wondering if we did enough. Did we pray with and over them enough? Did we teach them good life lessons? If we are making the right decisions ourselves. If we are hearing the voice of God. If our simple, harmless everyday decisions really even matter to God and how will they affect our children.
My reality, though not perfect as far as our human eyes can see, is perfect for me. We are family. Dad, mom, brothers and sister, family. We take the punches and roll with them….Together
God is my very present help in times of trouble. He is my help even when there is no trouble. God IS!
(FYI: No nothing is wrong, just thinking & writing)